


Every Villain Is a Hero (in his own mind)

by AvocadoLove



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Bucky Barnes Is a Good Bro, Evil SHIELD, Identity Porn, M/M, OR IS HE, Sam Wilson Is a Good Bro, Super Husbands, Tony Stark is a villain, Villain Tony Stark
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-21
Updated: 2014-09-25
Packaged: 2018-02-18 06:46:34
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 10,195
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2339012
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AvocadoLove/pseuds/AvocadoLove
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tony is the villain known as Iron Man. Steve is Captain America. Outside work, Steve and Tony are married and do not know each other's secret identities. Some revelations, though, do not come with a happy ending.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I'm a little blocked on some of my other projects, so I had to write an angst-fest to get me out of my slump. ~~I have about a million and one other WIP's so there probably won't be a part two, but... well. Never say never.~~
> 
>  **Edit:** I have no self control. None.
> 
> SPOILER: This is an angsty, sad, fic that almost made _me_ cry while writing it. So if you have emotionally sensitive triggers, please go to rot13.com and enter this spoiler code to check before reading: Gbal vf cerfhzrq qrnq sbe zbfg bs gur svp, ohg ur'f bayl Zneiry qrnq. Ur cbcf hc nyvir va gur ynfg fprar. Lnl.
> 
> Loosely based off this KM Prompt: http://avengerkink.livejournal.com/19023.html?thread=44800591#t44800591
> 
>  
> 
> _Based on the Steve/Tony fill that just updated where they're married but their secret alter egos are enemies and Tony doesn't figure it out until Captain America dies. I'd like the reverse of that fill, where Steve doesn't realize Tony is Iron Man until the super villain goes down in battle. Whether Steve is the one to take him down or not is up to you._
> 
>  
> 
> _\+ If Tony's not really dead_  
>  ++ If S.H.I.E.L.D. knew the whole time  
> +++ If other super villains taunt Steve (Captain America) about it  
> ++++ based on the fill's updates, Tony never wanted to be a bad guy to begin with  
> +++++ S.H.I.E.L.D won't help Steve get Tony back

* * *

 

 

The sun shone blood red in the smoky afternoon sky. From the high vantage point on the roof of Stark tower, Tony could see plumes of smoke from at least a dozen fires around the city. His HUD helpfully showed him even more.

“Well, this is a fine mess,” Tony said, and Iron Man’s computerized voice came out as a drawl. He turned to look at the Avenger's Tower a few blocks away -- one of the few buildings which was not on fire. Gee. Why would that be? “What’s the phrase? Good enough for government work?”

The two bird brothers from another mother scowled at Tony. Captain America’s jaw did that clenchy thing it did when he was _really_ pissed.

To be fair -- and Tony was always fair, no matter what _some_ in the League of Villains said -- the Avengers did look the worse for wear. That’s what three days of fighting an undying army of hulklings across the city would do to a trio of do-gooders. But the Avengers were no closer to saving the day. Meanwhile, the city was getting more... smashed.

Something had to be done, and Tony was a lot of things, but at least he did what needed doing.

Avengers and Villains stood in two separate groups, a strip of no man's land between them -- but that was okay. For Tony’s plan to work, they didn’t have to function as one unit.

“How do we know we can trust them?” Falcon asked, loud enough to be heard by all.

Captain America glanced over at Tony’s side of the roof.

“We don’t,” Cap replied, “but I’m not seeing much of a choice here.”

“Hey bird boy, this is your side's mess," Tony said. "General Ross subcontracts for SHIELD. Those are _his_ hulklings--”

“Using the Hulk’s blood--” Cap blurted.

“That he took from force after he kidnapped Doctor Banner.” Bruce was a known part-time Villain League member. Tony could use his name. "Blaming the victim, much, Captain?"

“This feels wrong,” said Captain's other flunky. The archer who dressed in purple and black leather. Hawkguy? Hawkeye? Something like that. “Two weeks ago, Iron Man was trying to bomb Roxxon Oil. Now he’s giving us an antidote?”

By Tony’s side, the Winter Soldier shifted his weight from foot-to-foot. “ _Tell the complainer to shut up, or I will do it for him_ ,” the Winter Soldier muttered in Russian -- incidentally, all he spoke, even though he understood English just fine. Tony couldn’t see the Soldier's face under his muzzle-like mask and sunglasses, of course, but imagined he looked more murderous than usual.

Captain America gave the villains a quick, suspicious glance, “What did he just say?”

“That he’s ready and raring to go.” Tony’s voice came out flat through the Iron Man armor.

The Winter Soldier snorted.

Captain America was big and wore a dumb flag motif, but he wasn’t a fool. He clenched his jaw again. “You say the Villain League has the means to stop the hulklings, but only the three of you showed up? That's it?”

“We’re a League,” the Black Widow said from Tony's other side, “not an army. Iron Man sent out a call. We answered.”

"Deadpool said he'd be around later," Tony added. He didn't miss Captain America's wince. Yeah, he felt the same way. Deadpool wasn't on anyone's side, per say. He just... was.

Tony didn't bother explaining motivations. This was Iron Man’s city. Tony loved it, let himself be labeled a villain _and_ lied to his husband on a daily basis in order to keep it safe.  The Winter Soldier was always ready to pay back a pound of flesh for whatever SHIELD had done to him before he escaped to join the League. The Black Widow actually _was_ a double-agent working with SHIELD to infiltrate the League -- she was good, JARVIS was better-- but Tony believed firmly in keeping your enemies closer, ect, ect. Whatever. She was there and ready to fight.

Cap said nothing, and Tony shrugged.

“Welp, I guess he doesn’t want our help.” Tony turned. “Gentleman. Lady.”

“Wait.” Cap looked like he was chewing nails. Then he stepped forward and extended a hand to shake. “You're right, the safety of the city comes first. Truce?”

Tony wouldn't have taken his hand anyway, but before he could think of a comeback, the Winter Soldier stepped right in his path. Putting himself between Tony and the Captain.

The Winter Soldier spat to the side. “ _There will be no truce, Comrade, as long as you remain a dog for SHIELD._ ”

“Um.” Cap glanced at Tony. “What?”

“This isn’t a truce, Cap," Tony said, glancing sidelong at the Soldier. _Comrade_? He'd have to ask about that, later. "Today we have the same enemy. That’s all.”

The Captain’s fingers curled in. He nodded once, his hand dropping. For a weird moment, the expression on the uncovered portions of his face almost reminded Tony of Steve -- how he wanted to make friends with everyone. How it hurt him every single time it didn't happen.

Tony ruthlessly pushed down a small spike of pity.

"I'm assuming you have a plan," Cap said.

Tony snorted. "Do we have a plan," he repeated in derision.

Black Widow pulled out a small box from... somewhere out of her catsuit, and flipped up the lid to reveal the antidote Bruce Banner himself had formulated. The actual Hulk was too powerful for it to do anything other than knock him out for a couple minutes. But it should return the knockoff hulklings back to normal.

"This needs to be injected directly," she said, and went on to describe what she knew of the plan. Of course there was more, but like hell Tony was going to tell an undercover SHIELD operative everything.

Tony carefully didn't look at the Winter Soldier. The Russian knew what he had to do, already. Half of it had been his idea.

The Falcon lodged another protest, and as Captain America turned away to deal with his lackey and order him to get the supplies they would need, Tony stepped back and cut his microphone to the outside. His plan was brilliant -- they all were -- but until the antidote took effect the hulklings were nearly indestructible. This was going to be dangerous.

JARVIS, bless his non-existent heart, knew exactly what Tony wanted before he said it.

"Shall I place a call to Steve, sir?"

Tony swallowed, glanced over to make sure no one was paying him attention, and turned away from both groups. Thank God for Iron Man's poker face. "Might as well. Audio only."

"Of course, sir."

The phone rang at least five times before he heard Steve's breathless, "Hello? Tony?"

"Hey, babe." He forced his own voice to be light, to not betray any of the nervousness he was feeling inside. So much could go wrong. Even if things went right, he didn't trust SHIELD not to turn on him the second the worst was over. Drag him down to one of their HYDRA-funded labs the SHIELD goons at the top pretended didn't exist. "Just wanted to check on you, make sure the kids aren't driving you into Shining levels of crazy. All work and no play makes Steve a dull boy."

"Tony." Steve's voice came out fond, exasperated, but mildly subdued, as if he was trying to keep his voice down. Maybe Tony had interrupted nap time at the school. Steve was a first grade teacher, and a lot of the time he couldn't answer the phone when Tony called -- it being the middle of class. Tony had absolutely been barred from popping in at the school, on pain of sleeping in the guest room for a week.  "I'm fine. The school's emergency shelter is well stocked and secure. _We're_ fine. Just like when you called a couple hours ago."

"What can I say? I like hearing your voice. It's an addiction and I'm a junkie." Pause. "How are the kids?"

"Holding up. They're a little scared, but brave. It's the parents I'm worried about."

"Same here," Tony lied. As far as Steve knew, Tony was holed up in the Stark tower basement shelter while the city-wide hulkling emergency went down. "Well, employees, kids. Same difference, right?"

Steve laughed softly, and Tony felt his mouth curl into a smile. Some of the weight of exhaustion fell off his shoulders. This was why he did it. Why he didn't just abandon the city and make Iron Man global, why he didn't come out in the open with all the dirt on the SHIELD/HYDRA connection with the full weight and evidence he could bring forward as Tony Stark.

If he came out to the public as a businessman/superhero, Steve would become an instant target. Tony would hang up his suit before he let that happen.

"Tony," Steve's voice became serious. "There's... I just heard a news report -- I think Captain America and his men are going to make a last push to drive the hulklings away. Things might get messy around the tower."

 _Really?_ Tony looked around. There wasn't a news helicopter in the sky. SHIELD must have leaked something.

"Steve I'm a businessman, not a fireman. I'm eating bon-bons, surrounded by bowing middle-management. I'm not leaving my hidey hole."

"Right," Steve said with another laugh. "Just be careful."

"You too." Steve's school was in the suburbs, out of the line of fire. Even if it was, Tony wasn't too worried. He'd hidden a couple of laser cannons in the nearby greenbelt to dissuade any hulklings from coming close.

"Maybe this will be over by evening." Tony knew it would be, one way or another. "I'll send Happy to pick you up. We'll have a date."

"Don't you dare. It's a warzone out there. Pepper would kill you."

Jarvis flashed a warning in his HUD -- Falcon was returning with supplies: Syringes and dart guns to load the antidote.

"I gotta go," Steve said, with his great timing. As usual. "Kids are waking up."

"Okay," Tony said, reluctant to hang up. "Love ya."

"I love you, Tony," Steve said. The call disconnected.

With a sigh, Tony reconnected the outside microphone and then rejoined the group. Captain America was tucking some kind of communicator in his pocket, turning to talk to the approaching Falcon.

The Winter Soldier was staring impassively at Tony from behind his sunglasses. Tony didn't know what his problem was -- probably nothing at all. The man had apparently been put through several involuntary lobotomies _and_ electro-shock therapy while under SHIELD/HYDRA's tender care. He was a little strange.

"JARVIS, I'll need a full diagnostic on all armor defense systems before going into battle. This is going to be a long afternoon."

"Yes, sir."

 

* * *

**OoOoO**

* * *

 

 

 

The good news was the antidote worked. The bad news was that after injection there was a delay of ten or fifteen minutes, and the _really_ bad news was that the hulklings went berserk before they shrunk back down to human size. 

The extra, extra no good terrible news was that Tony's secret plan was also working. The Winter Soldier had scurried off under cover of mid-battle to find and release Bruce Banner while the Avengers were busy. So far, none of the heroes noticed he was missing.

Black Widow could be trusted to save her own skin, and so Tony was left alone to fight along side with the Avengers. 

"Iron Man, dive!" Falcon barked in Tony's communicator.

It was a good thing Tony's reactions were quick. He cut the repulsers and lost altitude just as a hulkling sprang out of a nearby building to tackle him. It missed, falling back down to earth with a frustrated roar. 

Falcon signaled he was going after it, and with a sweep of his wings, he dived. Tony paused to watch, a little impressed at the man's control despite himself. Meh. If he had to use his business persona to give weapons to SHIELD to keep them from getting suspicious, at least they were going to the right people.

"Two more hulklings have been hit with the antidote," Captain America reported tersely over the lines. "That's probably half of them, if my count is right."

"Just over half," Tony reported. No reason to get sloppy with the math. "Fifty-five percent."

He glanced down just in time to see Cap engage another hulkling with his shield. This section of downtown had become more or less deserted during the fighting -- windows blown out and chunks of concrete littering the street.

Captain America threw his shield. It bounced off a chipped concrete wall, destroyed to the point where rebar stood out from it, and smacked the hulkling from behind, sending it into Cap's fist.

It staggered to the side. Cap grinned wolfishly and jumped up, injecting the thing right in its neck.

JARVIS flashed a warning, but Tony saw it too. "Cap!" he yelled as a heat signature told him there was a second hulkling lurking on the other side of a thick concrete wall, five stories up. Pushing against it. "Look out! That wall's coming down!"

The Captain looked around, but not up. Clearly not seeing the danger. Not trusting Tony's word enough to heed his warning.

Tony didn't think. He spilled air and, cursing, landed and threw Cap to the side and out of the way as the hulkling he'd injected scrabbled at his neck. The HUD screamed: The concrete wall was falling -- several tons worth of rock reinforced with metal-- and Tony would have gotten out of the way, but the hulkling Cap had injected gave another wild roar and tackled him, instead. They skidded to the ground. Tony fired his repulsers, blasting him away a second before the concrete wall with its bristling rebar spikes came crashing down.

Pressure.  Blackness. Pain.

Pain. Pain. Pain.

He couldn't move. Terrible pressure surrounded him from all sides -- he couldn't feel his feet, which was a bad sign -- and what parts of him he _could_ feel was a searing pain right through his middle and out his back.

The HUD flickered back to life, showing a breach to the integrity right at the armor's abdomen.

"No shit," Tony gasped. He could taste blood in his mouth, warm and metallic. "Medical scan, JARVIS. Tell me the bad news."

"Iron Man!" Some of the pressure eased from his chest. Tony blinked as a slab of concrete was lifted away. Then Captain America's dumb, patriotic face gaped down at him. "Are you with me, pal?"

Save the man's life, and suddenly they were pals. Great. "How bad?" Tony asked, in answer. Though he knew it was bad. Moving was... out of the question.

Captain America's eyes were grave. "I think it's gone right through."

It took everything Tony had to crane his neck up and look. He immediately wish he hadn't. His lower half was hidden under rubble, but a shaft of rebar had come down on him like a spike. The force had actually broken through the armor. He'd been impaled right through the middle "... Yeah," he breathed, leaning back.

"You saved my life," Cap said softly. Shocked.

"I didn't mean it at the expense of mine."

And the moment he said it aloud, he knew it was true. He wasn't walking away from this. Oh God, Steve...

"Should I pull it free?" Cap asked, gesturing to the rebar.

"No, that'll make me... bleed out quicker. Leave it."

Captain America seemed like he didn't know what to say. He looked young at that moment, impossibly young. Tony felt the weird urge to comfort him, which was... just no.

"Cap," he said, his mind racing ahead. He could use the Captain's guilt, _needed_ to use it to protect Steve. "I need a favor."

"What?"

"After this is all over, SHEILD's gonna crack open the suit, see who I am." Tony took a shuddering breath. "I have a husband."

The Captain blinked. "You have a husband."

Tony felt a twinge of annoyance. "I don't have time for your period-authentic homophobia," he snapped. Cap started to flush, started to deny it, probably was about to say he had lots of gay friends. (Yeah right.) But Tony cut him off. "He didn't know about... He's good. He's innocent. He doesn't know _anything_ about Iron Man, I swear it. Cap," he drew in a breath. "I saved your life, here... Just make sure SHIELD doesn't get their hands on him."

Cap's frown deepened. "If he truly doesn't know, then SHIELD wouldn't prosecute--"

"Whatever," Tony said bitterly, not wanting to hear it. The Captain had to be blind if he didn't see the dark underbelly of SHIELD. And if the displays on his vitals were to be believed, Tony didn't have much time left. He didn't want to spend it on Captain Fucking America. "Get out of here. Save the day."

Cap rose, but he looked conflicted. A hulkling roared in the distance. "Iron Man -- thank you."

"Yeah," he gasped as a sparkling, tingly pain shivered up his spine. "Anytime."

"I'll do what I can for your husband. You have my word."

It was ridiculous, he shouldn't trust the word of a SHIELD minion, but the steady, determined look in the Captain's eyes made Tony feel marginally better. He tilted his head in a slight nod.

Hefting his shield, Cap left.

JARVIS's voice was gentle. "Shall I put in a call to Steve, sir?"

 _What am I supposed to tell him?_ Tony thought wildly, _I'm Iron Man and I'm dying. Love ya, babe. Bye?_ But he could taste blood in his mouth, and the scans showed him that he was hemorrhaging internally. Time to put up or shut up. He cracked a sad smile. "Might as well."

The phone rang and rang, then went into voicemail.

Tony firmly squashed a jolt of anxiety. Steve was probably hunkered down with the kids -- maybe was in the middle of calming a hysterical child. And maybe... maybe this was for the best.

"Steve," he said after the friendly voice message prompted him to leave a message. A hundred -- a _thousand_ things popped into his head, but all Tony could manage was, "I'm sorry, I won't be making our date. I..." A wave of dizziness made him close his eyes. They burned with tears. "I always hated this sort of thing, in romance movies. Our life was kind of a romance movie, you know? I was just hoping for more of a happy ending than The Notebook, but I..." He was getting off track. Focus Stark.

"The last four years have been the happiest I've ever been," Tony blurted into the silence. "I didn't deserve that sort of happiness, not after the whole merchant of death thing. If the world was fair, if karma existed, I should have been miserable. But you... you made it impossible. God, Steve, I wanted to grow old with you."

It was hard to keep his eyes open, so Tony let them fall shut, thinking of his husband's face. "I shouldn't have been ridiculously, gloriously, dancing in the rain happy, but you did it. Being with you..."

 He knew the science behind death -- he'd gone through a morbid teenage phase just like every other rebel without a cause -- knew he was bleeding out, that his synapses and oxygen starved neurons were firing wildly, flooding his system with dopamine and all the other feel good-hormones. Tony _knew_ he wasn't really in the memory his mind brought up: the night Tony proposed.

But he was suddenly there, on one knee, holding out a box and a ring, watching as Steve's beautiful eyes lit up. "When you said yes," Tony said and his voice had a little bit of a slur even he could hear, "I thought this is it -- maybe it's downhill from here. But it always went uphill with you... and when we danced..."

Steve always loved to dance.  And Tony was _there_ ,  surrounded in Steve's arms. A place without fear and pain. "I was safe," he told the Steve in his memories, whispering it into his ear, "and happy." He leaned in, touching Steve's cheek. His own hand felt so heavy he could barely lift it, even in his own mind. "I... love you, Steve."

He took a single, shuddering breath. The bright points of pain were very far away now, and he couldn't even feel the cooling wetness on his cheeks. "I wish..." he murmured, and let out a last breath.

A minute later the voicemail box said that his recording had reached the limit and asked if Tony would like to rerecord the message. There was no answer. 

 

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I really, really intended only one chapter, but... I couldn't just leave it there, could I? :D

* * *

 

 

It was a long, hard slog, but finally the last of the hulklings had been injected with the antidote and shrunk down to human size. Exhausted and beaten, they were barely able to lift their heads, much less put up a fight. Every one of them were tagged for later pick-up.

Steve's lips pressed into a thin, angry line. He didn't recognize most of the former hulklings, but those he did were SHIELD agents. General Ross was trying to recreate the super soldier serum again, and it had gotten out of control.

Stepping back from the last of the downed hulklings, Steve dragged the back of his wrist over his sweaty forehead. This had been a hollow victory. The city had been under siege for three days, and it burned deep down inside that the only reason they'd succeeded was because of help from the Villain League, of all people.

And Iron Man had fallen -- _died_ \-- while saving Steve's life.

SHIELD agents would be swarming in at any moment, now that the hulklings were neutralized. Their first priority would be to cover up SHIELD involvement in this mess -- though Steve tried not to think about that very hard. He knew his place on the front lines. It had been made very clear from the moment he'd been unfrozen that he didn't understand this new world enough to participate in logistics and political intrigue.

SHIELD's second priority would be to recover and identify Iron Man's body.

Steve had made a promise to protect Iron Man's husband (if he could), but he couldn't do that unless he knew the man's identity.  He should have asked Iron Man right then and there, but the hulklings needed to be dealt with, and Iron Man had given him the impression that finding out who he was would be easy. He might have been in a position of power, a person of trust.

That thought sent a shiver down Steve's spine, and a large part of him didn't want to deal with this -- didn't want to tell his arch enemy's spouse that the man he loved was dead. Steve just wanted to hoof it back to his and Tony's penthouse in the tower, crawl under the covers with his own husband and sleep and sleep.

 _Afterward_ , he promised himself. When all was said and done, he was going to insist Tony put JARVIS on lockdown. They'd make an evening just for themselves. Steve would bury himself in Tony and not think about Iron Man shoving him out of the way, taking a hit that should have been Steve's.

"Hawkeye," Steve said tiredly, seeing the archer standing nearby. "That's the last of the hulklings. I'm going to--" He jerked a thumb back down the block, where mounds of rubble blocked the street. Iron Man was still half buried over there.

He didn't expect Clint to nod and holster his bow to his back, increasing his stride to join him. Steve gave him a sideways glance, but Clint shrugged in answer.

"Curiosity killed the cat," Steve warned.

"Good thing I'm a hawk."

Steve was too tired to do anything else but snort.

"Iron Man did the right thing at the end, but I still don't trust the Villains," Clint said. "I saw Black Widow a few minutes ago, but where'd the Winter Soldier go?"

"He must have taken off after Iron Man went down."

Some SHIELD analysts believed that the Soldier was Iron Man's right hand man, though Steve never bought into that theory. The few times the Avengers faced the both of them in battle, they worked as a pair, not as one leading the other. They didn't seem to have the same end goals either.

The Soldier killed people -- retired military and various political targets-- in quick, efficient assassinations. Worse, the Soldier didn't seem to mind collateral damage.

Iron Man, despite his many, many faults, usually had minimal casualties. His targets were always corporate based, with an emphasis on destroying property and weapons that could compete against Iron Man's own.

They turned the corner, and Steve stopped dead.

The Iron Man suit was on fire.

"What the--" Steve forced his tired legs into a jog. The flames were yellow-white and blue, so bright he could hardly look without his eyes watering. He could feel the heat from at least thirty feet away.

Clint swore by his side. "Thermite."

Shielding his eyes with one hand, Steve forced himself to look. There must have been some kind of auto self-destruct on the suit. It made sense. And suddenly Steve wished he had taken the time to pop off the helmet before he left. Even if he had only gotten one look, he could have reconstructed a face from memory.

Then Steve spied something laying along side the armor's body: The piece of rebar that had killed Iron Man, red blood glinting in the flames. Iron Man must have removed it, ended his suffering quicker.

And that blood had DNA.

Gritting his teeth, Steve surged forward, ignoring Clint's warning yell. The heat was incredible, tightening the skin on his face. So hot it felt like he was running up to the sun.

The thermite was melting the Iron Man suit into useless slag -- SHIELD scientists wouldn't get any useful technology out of it. As Steve approached, the face-plate of the helmet popped off. The man inside was already blackened and burnt beyond recognition, skull-like mouth gaping open in death, what was left of the skin and bone sizzling from the heat and...

... Steve didn't think he was going to let Tony drag him to a company barbecue anytime soon.

Shield held out in front of him, Steve scooped up the end of the rebar, hunched, and backed away. The rebar was so heated it started smoking in his gloved hands, but hopefully the blood still had usable DNA.

"Christ, Cap," Clint muttered, meeting Steve halfway and dragging him back still further. "I hope that was worth it."

"It might be."

They watched in silence as the Iron Man suit melted in its own funeral pyre.

Steve frowned. Iron Man had been concerned that his identity would be found out, but... why would that be if this was going to happen? Had he been concerned that the armor wouldn't melt in time? Or... Well. Steve wouldn't put it past a _villain_ to trick SHIELD agents into loading the armor into a quinjet before this nasty surprise went off.

His phone buzzed at his hip. Steve glanced away from the burning armor -- there was nothing much left to see. The fire burned so hot it was actually melting the concrete around it -- and pulled out his phone.

He had a missed call from Tony over an hour ago. The voicemail notification was set to ping Steve every five minutes, but he'd been a little busy. Steve keyed in his passcode and put the phone to his ear.

"Steve," Tony's recorded voice said, and from that first word  Steve knew something was very, very wrong.

"I'm not gonna make our date..." Tony continued, and Steve felt himself still.

As Tony progressed into a nonsensical ramble about dancing in the rain, Steve's phone beeped with a priority one alert from SHIELD.

But Steve didn't move. He was frozen in place, listening as Tony started trailing off, his breathing labored.

_For heavens sake, Tony. What's wrong? Just tell me what's happening..._

Distantly, Steve heard Clint contact SHIELD on his behalf, and heard him say something about the Winter Soldier breaking into SHIELD HQ.  Multiple agents had been killed and Dr. Banner had been broken out from General Ross's labs. But Steve didn't care.

"Captain, are you with me?" Clint asked.

"Something's wrong," Steve rasped, the phone dropping just as Tony breathed, "I wish..." Then nothing.

He turned to look at Stark Tower, rising into the skyline not ten blocks away. With a sinking feeling, he knew what had to have happened. A hulkling must have gotten past the Avenger's lines, broken into the emergency shelter. Oh God...

"Tony's in danger."

"Go," Hawkeye said, but he needn't have bothered. Steve was already gone.

Steve could outrun a horse at full gallop, leap over obstacles that would daunt an Olympian, but every second felt like too long. He didn't bother to key in his code at the locked glass front doors, just bent his head, brought up his shield, and crashed through.

He pelted through the hallway. One kick to the stairway door, and it burst open.  Stark Industries emergency shelter was in the basement.

Edging on panic, blind to everything except what was right in front of him, Steve didn't notice that the lobby had been spotless; there had been no sign of forced entry, except for him.

And later he would think back that it was amazing no security personal shot him. He must have looked a sight, kicking in locked doors, leaping the stairwell landings two stories at a time -- he'd forgotten he was Captain America.

He was only Steve Rogers, terrified for his husband.

A number of haggard men and women in suits screamed as he broke open the door and rushed in.

"Where's Tony?" he yelled, twisting around, searching, searching. No one spoke. He must have looked a sight: Captain America, spotted with hulkling blood, wide-eyed, carrying his shield in one hand, a bloody shaft of rebar in the other.

Pepper stepped forward. "Mr. Stark isn't here, Captain," she said cautiously.

Captain. Of course. She didn't know Steve's superhero identity.  Steve forced his voice to come out even. "Where did he go, Miss Potts?"

She didn't answer for a long, telling moment.

"Stark hasn't been around for three days," someone piped up.

_What?_

"He's here... He said he was here." Steve was met with a wall of blank, confused faces.

He'd gotten the voicemail an hour ago. Maybe Tony was up in the penthouse? It would be just like him to try to direct emergency medical services from behind the scenes, throw the might of Stark Industries around to help the city while his own people sought shelter. Eating bon-bons with bowing middle management indeed. Steve was going to kill him -- once he found him.

Wordlessly, Steve backed out and ran for the elevator. He punched in the special codes that overrode JARVIS's programming. It had been one of the conditions Fury had insisted on in exchange for allowing Steve to move in with Tony. SHIELD techs had secretly installed a bug in JARVIS to keep Steve's identity a secret. Every time Steve used it, he felt vaguely guilty -- Tony would have been so angry if he knew, and Steve thought of JARVIS as a friend more than a computer -- but it had to be done.

The elevator took him swiftly to the penthouse. There was a bad smell coming from the kitchen -- the garbage needed to be taken out three days ago.

"Tony?" Steve called, then corrected himself. He was Captain America right now. "Mr. Stark?" There was no reply, and his heart beat faster.

"Stark, come out right now!" he snapped, stalking from their bedroom with the sheets still rumpled, to the bathroom, and the small library Tony had built just for him. Empty. Empty. Empty.

Frustrated, scared, Steve turned in place. Where could have Tony gone? The school where he thought Steve worked? Why wasn't he in the emergency shelter like he'd _promised_ in the first place?  

That voicemail had been a goodbye.

Going to the nearest panel, Steve entered the code that would cancel the SHIELD override.

Instantly, the living room flooded with red light. "Unauthorized entry," came JARVIS's crisp voice. "Captain America is not allowed in these premises unescorted."

JARVIS had specific instructions for Captain America? That was odd, but Steve didn't have time for this.

Steve stripped off his cowl. "JARVIS, it's me."

There was a very, very telling silence. If he didn't know better, Steve would have thought the super computer was shocked.

"Voice and retinal scan confirmed," JARVIS said. The red lights shifted back to white.

"Thank you. Where's Tony?" Steve said.

"Unknown, sir."

"What do you mean, unknown? He never takes off his tracker." Stark Industries was high profile, and death threats from terrorists and corporate rivals weren't uncommon. The tracker was a safety precaution -- something Steve had insisted on, so Tony would never be out of touch with JARVIS in case of an emergency. (Or if, goodness forbid, a super villain was able to track Steve's real identity down.) It had been the subject of their first real fight, but Steve knew how to dig in his heels. Tony had eventually seen sense, and as far as Steve knew, he never went without it.

"Indeed, sir." It wasn't his imagination. JARVIS's voice had taken a cool clip.

Steve opened his mouth to demand an explanation -- he'd key in the override codes again if he had to -- but stopped as his eyes fell to the doorway down to the lab.

Of course.

He took the short stairway and stepped inside lab, which was familiar with its clean lines and smell of motor oil. Dummy raised itself up and clicked its claw at him, but otherwise the lab was silent and empty.

Steve frowned around, then realized he was still holding the bloodied rebar. A tickle of suspicion crossed his mind, fueled by JARVIS's silence. But... no. No, it wasn't... that was stupid. Impossible.

He still set the end of the bloody shaft on top of one of JARVIS's scanners. "Can you scan this and identify the DNA?"

JARVIS was quicker than any of the SHIELD AI systems. "DNA scan completed," he said promptly.

"And?" Steve said.

In answer, a portion of the back wall cracked open and slid to the side, making Steve jump. There was a second part to the lab? He'd been down here a hundred times chasing after Tony, making him eat when he got distracted, sitting on the couch with his own sketchbook as Tony worked. That portion of the wall had never been opened. Never.

"There is, perhaps, something sir would have wanted you to see," JARVIS said.

 _Would_ have wanted?

Distantly, Steve felt his legs carry him forward to the hidden door. He stopped, took a look around at the various Iron Man suits; some of them hanging in states of repair, some of them being built. 

Steve never felt his knees give out on him. Only registered the jolt when he hit the floor. His throat closed on a wheeze, just like it had when Bucky had fallen -- the serum had cured his asthma, but some things were psychological.

_No, no... oh no please. God in heaven, no..._

The helmet popping open under the heat of the thermite fire. The burned face...

The sound that came from Steve's throat was piteous, a whine.  He couldn't get air.

All the times he'd fought Iron Man.... It couldn't be possible. He would have _noticed_ if he'd been battling his husband, wouldn't he? But there were all the missed dates due to emergency meetings, the bruises Tony laughingly played off as mixed martial arts with Happy.

Tony's arc reactor. " _It has the juice to power my heart for fifty lifetimes,_ " Tony had once joked.

Power enough for the Iron Man suit?

" _I have a husband,_ " Iron Man had said. " _He's good. He's innocent. He doesn't know anything about Iron Man, I swear it._ "

Steve didn't know how long he knelt, curled into himself, his heart felt like it had been ripped in half.

Tony had died alone. Died working against the peace Steve had fought for seventy years to achieve. His own husband. His Tony. A villain.

Iron Man.


	3. Chapter 3

 

"Sir, Falcon has requested Captain America's location in the tower," JARVIS said.

Steve looked up. He had no idea how long he had knelt on Tony's workshop floor, curled into himself with half-built Iron Man suits hanging in accusation above him.

For a moment, Steve thought about letting Sam into the workshop -- he was one of the few who knew both of Steve's identities --  but this pain, Tony's loss and... _betrayal_ , was too raw to share. Even with Sam.

Somehow Steve uncurled his legs. He left the bloodied piece of rebar where it was, and dragged himself to his feet. Step by painful step, he walked out of the hidden workshop.

"Shut the door, JARVIS. Lock it."

The door to Tony's Iron Man workshop slid shut and sealed into the wall, like it was never there.

When Sam arrived, he took one look at Steve and immediately went to his side. "What happened?"

"Tony." Steve wanted to say more, but the words were caught in his thickening throat. "The hulklings." He gestured futilely to the outside, swallowing again and again. "He didn't make it." Bile rose up, the smell of burning flesh came again into his nose, and he had to press the back of his hand to his mouth.

"Oh man," Sam said softly. "Oh man... Steve, I--sit down. There we go. Head between your knees."

Sam had him sit on the lab couch -- _Tony's_ couch where he and Tony had made love too many times to count. Steve had the wild thought that when SHIELD found out and tore this place apart, he hoped no one came around with a blacklight. A hysterical noise bubbled up out of him.

Sam's hand was a steady presence, resting between his shoulder blades. Rubbing there until Steve managed to calm himself.

"Where's he now?" Sam asked calmly.

 _Burned to a crisp_... _I watched and did nothing._   "Pepper," Steve blurted. There was a time when he used to have trouble lying, but living four years with duel identities had made him pretty good. His mother would be so proud. "She's taking care of... the arrangements."

"Okay. Then we need to get you upstairs."

"No, we'll be required to debrief soon." Steve heard a strange edge of panic in his voice, as if from far away. But the thought of looking Fury and Pierce in the eye and tell them about Tony was too terrible to bear. "You know what will happen if I don't show up." They'll come for him -- take him back and restrict his movements, revoke his privileges and lock him back in the Triskelion.  

"Man, there's such a thing as bereavement leave. Even SHIELD has to recognize that." Sam's voice held so much acid and frustration that Steve turned to shoot him a look of warning. It wasn't smart to voice their complaints aloud. Not even here, in Tony's lab.

"Sam--"

"Steve, shut the hell up," Sam said firmly, and maybe he was right because he was able to guide Steve upstairs. Steve felt brittle, weak, like he'd been thrown back into his own body. "I can take care of SHIELD right now."

"You're sure?"

"Captain America can't take care of this. You have to."

He was right. Steve let out a long sigh of relief and leaned just a little of his weight on Sam. He could bear it. "Thanks, doc," he joked.

The smile Sam shot back was a little sad. He'd once confided to Steve that he'd joined the Air Force in hopes of paying for college so he could be a councilor. But SHIELD had recognized his talent with the Exo-7 wings. And that had been that.

"Sam." Steve almost blurted it out. Sam was the closest thing to his best friend in this new time -- but if Steve said Tony was Iron Man, Sam would have to report it to SHIELD. It would be suicide not to.

So when Sam looked at him, Steve forced himself to hold back the words and just said a simple, "Thanks."

 

* * *

**OoOoO**  

 

* * *

 

 

 

Steve stripped mechanically out of his Captain America uniform, feeling like he was tucking something away. Something vital he couldn't put a finger on. 

"JARVIS," he said quietly when he looked like himself again. His throat felt raw, and he wasn't sure why. He hadn't been screaming, but it felt like it. "Tell Pepper to come up to the penthouse."

JARVIS didn't reply -- Steve got the feeling the AI was angry with him, as much as that were possible. Or maybe JARVIS was as capable of grief as anyone who had just lost the equivalent of a parent.

JARVIS remained quiet at Pepper's arrival, too. The only alert was the elevator ding before the door slid open and Pepper stepped out.

"Steve," she said, stopping in surprise. "I thought you were at your school -- where's Tony?" The look in his eyes must have been terrible, because she paled and strode forward. "Steve," she repeated slowly, "Where's Tony?"

He heard his own voice as if from very far away. "Captain America told me... he's gone, Pepper."

"Gone?" Watching Pepper as close as he was, he saw her rainbow of reactions slide from immediate shock to slow, gradual fear. But not surprise. "And his body?" she asked, a hand to her throat. And that confirmed she knew Tony was Iron Man. She _knew_.

"Destroyed, along with the Iron Man suit," Steve said.

She took a step back, her hand slowly rising to touching her lips. Her eyes were wide. She didn't ask if Steve was sure -- the look on his face probably said it all. And even though Steve was angry -- or at least he wanted to be, should be _enraged_ at her for helping to lie to him -- all Steve saw was Tony's long-time friend and closest confidant crumple into grief.

He stepped forward and hugged her. She let out a sob and leaned against his chest.

Staring straight ahead, Steve patted her back.

 

* * *

**OoOoO**

* * *

 

 

 

After that, time passed in a fog. Steve would have suspected he was drugged, if anything worked on him.

Pepper started the arrangements: The memorial was set for the following Sunday. He listened quietly to her ideas, and said yes to anything she suggested. She didn't bring up Iron Man, and neither did he. There was also the issue of the multibillion dollar company to divide and manage. Tony's Last Will and Testament had yet to be read, but Pepper assured Steve that he had inherited Tony's majority shares of Stark Industries.

He didn't care.

When not meeting with Pepper, he spent his time in bed, laying on his side with Tony's pillow under his head. It still had his scent -- probably would, for a couple weeks.

Sometimes he would make himself think: _I'm never going to see Tony again_ , just to test for a feeling. Any reaction. Like prodding a broken tooth to see how much it ached. There was nothing. Just... unending nothing.

He knew grief -- had become so swamped by it while he'd sat and drank after Bucky's death he felt like he'd been drowning. Back then, the only way he could keep his head above water was the promise of destroying the Red Skull. Be the soldier everyone wanted him to be.

And he'd grieved at the loss of his old world, too. It had been like watching this plastic and loud society spin 'round him, and feeling hopelessly behind, a step out of sync. Every new sight was an unpleasant shock -- and there had been so many of them at first. But Steve had made himself continue, threw all of his energy into SHIELD as the only lifeline he'd had left. And when they'd allowed it, he had gone out for short jaunts around the city. One foot in front of the other, soldier

He'd attended a gallery opening the Maria Stark foundation was putting on, and met a loud, brash son of a friend. A quick, handsome man who instantly captivated his attention. Steve put himself in the middle of a bidding war for a painting he didn't like, at a price he couldn't afford. Tony Stark had outbid him at every turn. It ended only when Tony had tacked on two extra zeros _and_ a request to take Steve out to coffee. With an offer like that, how could he have refused?

 _I'll lay down for just five more minutes_ , Steve told himself. _Then I'll get up. Fix myself breakfast. Take a shower and get dressed. Just focus on one small step at a time._ It was how he had dragged himself through the days when he first woke up from the ice. Keep going, soldier.

_In five minutes, I'll start to pull myself back up by the bootstraps. Just... five more minutes._

He'd close his eyes, and when he'd open them slants of sunlight was shining in a wholly different position on the floor.

Nothing had changed. He was never going to see Tony again. Never hear his laugh, never hold him in his arms, get in stupid arguments over reality TV shows, touch his face...

 _Five more minutes_ , he told himself.

Sometimes anger would come in quick, bright flashes to his gray world. _You son of a bitch, how could you be Iron Man? How could you betray me like this, kill innocent people, ruin lives... not tell me, not_ trust _me, and paint a target on my back for any villain who figured out who you were?_

Only Steve had done the same to Tony. The exact same thing.

Steve didn't replay Tony's voicemail again. Thanks to the serum, it replayed itself over and over in his head in crystal clear quality. Tony, taking his last, gasping breaths as he rambled about how Steve had made him happy. That Tony loved him.

Steve turned over, pressing his face into Tony's pillow. The blanket pulled up to his shoulder.

 _Five more minutes_ , he told himself.

 

* * *

**OoOoO**

* * *

 

 

 

SHIELD left him alone for two days. 

On the third, Steve's communicator beeped with the call to assemble. He was expected on the roof of Stark Tower in ten minutes.

Steve stared at the message dully, and almost put the communicator back down on the nightstand. But Captain America was bigger than himself, always had been. Besides, it was all he had left.

"I guess that means my bereavement's over," he said. There was no one else in the penthouse to answer him.

No time for a shower. Rolling out of bed, he robotically pulled on a fresh uniform, then walked to the bathroom for a quick shave. The man who stared back at him in the mirror was pale and red-eyed.

He was a little surprised SHIELD was bringing a helocoptor to him here: They used to be more circumspect, but word must have gone 'round of Tony's death. Now that Steve no longer had an inconvenient husband to hide from, Captain America could be picked up directly from the roof.

The helicopter was already waiting when he got to the rooftop, the rotor-blades still. But there wasn't a SHIELD logo on the side. Surprised, Steve stopped short.

Then the door to the helicopter slid open and someone tumbled out as if pushed. In shock, Steve saw it was the Black Widow.

Her hands were tied behind her back, and she gave a grimace as she straightened to her knees -- purple swelling already around one eye.

Beyond, the Winter Soldier stood in the open helicopter doorway. He held a handgun in his metal hand, and pointed it at the back of her head.

"What's going on?" Steve asked, reaching for his shield. He couldn't tell behind the dark sunglasses and muzzle-like facial mask, but he imagined the Soldier looked at him.

"You've got me." Black Widow grimaced again -- clearly the gravel on the rooftop was cutting into her knees.

The Soldier spoke sharply in Russian. Black Widow flinched. The Soldier repeated his demand and shot once -- the bullet ricocheting an inch from Widow's back foot.

"He says," Widow said, looking to Steve. "I'm to translate his words for you. He also wants me to say I'm an undercover SHIELD agent on assignment to infiltrate the League of Villains"

Steve stared at her, then glanced to the unwavering Winter Soldier, and back again. "Are you?"

She hesitated, and he knew the answer before she said it. Her eyes flickered: duty warring with self-preservation and the knowledge that the jigg was up. She probably guessed rightly that Steve would have more incentive to save her if she were one of his own.  "Yes," she said flatly.

The Soldier spoke again. A demand.

"I'm to translate for you exactly. If I do my job, he says he'll release me." Something in her voice made this seem doubtful. Steve didn't disagree.

This was also the first time the Winter Soldier had made an attempt to speak to an Avenger.

Steve looked from Widow to the Soldier. "You seem to understand English just fine," he said to him.

"English was my mother tongue," Widow translated. "It was burned away from me too many times. The men at SHIELD were not careful, and there was brain damage. I can no longer speak it."

Steve's brow furrowed. "I don't understand. You worked for SHIELD? Is that how you forged the call to assemble?"

"I was their asset. Their unwilling soldier."

Steve stared at him, wondering what the Soldier's end game was. Almost too tired to care. "Is that your excuse for all your assassinations? All the murders of SHIELD agents?"

"None were innocent. All were involved in the Winter Soldier program."

Maybe Steve should have pressed more, but what he saw when he looked at the Winter Soldier was all the times Iron Man -- _Tony_ \-- had stood by his side. Why? "I don't believe you," Steve said. "Let the lady go. Whatever problem you have with SHIELD, you can face me about it like a man."

The Soldier made a cutting motion in the air, and his words held a cruel edge even Steve could hear before Widow translated. "You have no right to speak to me that way. You, who let yourself become SHIELD's dog. You never even bothered to look at its underbelly."

"And what would that be?" Steve asked listlessly. How could he still feel so tired? He just spent the last two days in bed, for goodness sakes.

The Winter Soldier spoke a word that needed no translation. "HYDRA."

Steve stared. "You're wrong. I'm the first to admit SHIELD isn't perfect, but I've fought HYDRA -- I know them. SHIELD have nothing to do with the Red Skull."

"How would you know? You let them make you a perfect soldier, and you forgot how to be a good man, Steve."

Steve jerked. "How do you know my name?"

But the Winter Soldier didn't answer. Not directly. He cocked his head. "What if I told you it was SHIELD who killed your best friend."

Something hot throbbed briefly in Steve's heart. How dare the Winter Soldier bring up his name. "You don't know what you're talking about. Bucky died a hero, saving my life. He fell off a speeding train in the Swiss Alps."

The Soldier made a snarling sound. "James Buchanan Barnes died six months after you went into the ice. He died screaming under a knife in SSR headquarters in London."  

"You shut up." He felt himself shake.

"How does it feel, Steve?" the Winter Soldier asked, "To know you didn't save Bucky, and then left your own husband to die alone?"

Steve didn't make the decision to attack. He just ran at the Soldier, heedless of the gun in his metal hand. Of any self preservation at all. The rising swell of grief and anger broke the numb dam inside him. And the shout he gave sounded like a scream.

The Soldier didn't seem to care. He stepped to the side of Steve's headlong rush, blocking Steve's punch with his metal arm, and following it with a strike to Steve's diaphragm. A single, brutal kick sent Steve sprawling back into the gravel. The air knocked out of him.

Steve gasped for a moment, rolling into a crouch. His shield was still strapped to his back, but the Winter Soldier hadn't advanced. He still stood there, as if patiently waiting for Steve to collect himself. Why? He'd had him utterly dead to rights.

Forcing himself to breathe, Steve stood, wiping his nose. "You don't know a damn thing about me," he growled, "or them."

He couldn't tell, but the visible skin around the Soldier's eyes crinkled almost as if he were smiling. "Good," he said, but the thickness of his accent made it sound like, "Gud". "Anger. Da. Good. Good."

Then the Soldier reached up and removed his sunglasses, his mask.

Steve knew the second the sunglasses were gone. He'd never forgotten that shade of blue-gray in his eyes. And when the mask was pulled away, everything else matched, too. The shape of his mouth, his nose, the divot on his slightly weak chin.

"Bucky?"

The Soldier--Bucky-- shook his head. "No," he said short, terse. "Not--" His lips crinkled, as if trying to form unfamiliar words. Shaking his head again, he gave up and spoke in Russian.

The Black Widow had taken the opportunity to stand during Steve's attack. But she hadn't run away, and translated again for him. "In body, yes. Bucky Barnes' mind was razed to ash. They grew the Winter Soldier in his place."

Even she sounded slightly stunned. Bucky Barnes was a legend in the halls of SHIELD.

But Steve remembered a time when he and Bucky were ten. Steve had been edging on yet another asthma attack in an already bad week. They'd saved up for a movie that was supposed to roll a few minutes from then. They had to run to make it, and there was no way he could with his lungs already feeling so tight. Frustrated and filled with self pity, Steve had sat down and told Bucky to go on.

Bucky had begged him to stand up, to at least try. When Steve refused, Bucky considered him for a moment, then bent and smacked Steve right across the face with the flat of his hand. Shocked, Steve roared and surged up to knock Bucky over, sitting on the bigger boy, his fist drawn back. Bucky hadn't defended himself -- willing to take his lumps.

"What was that for?" Steve had demanded.

"Figured anger was more useful than self pity," Bucky said, then raised his chin up. "Go on, you can wallop me if you want. At least you're up again."

But Steve couldn't. "You're a jerk," he had said. The truth was, his face didn't even sting that much -- it had mostly been the surprise.

Bucky had grinned up at him. "Have'ta be, to keep up with you, punk."

They hadn't made the start of the movie, but they'd seen most of it.

The Winter Soldier wasn't smiling at Steve now, but his eyes glinted in the same way they had back then.

 _You're wrong_ , Steve thought. _You're not the same man you used to be, Bucky, and  neither am I. But you're still my jerk friend who has no problem giving me a slap in the face when I need it._

And with that revelation came more. "Zola experimented on you in the lab when your unit was captured. You survived that fall," Steve said, the pieces sliding together. Anger throbbed low and hot in his heart. "You're saying HYDRA did this to you? Or SHIELD?"

"SHIELD is more HYDRA, now, than SHIELD. The former SSR knowingly took in recalcitrant HYDRA agents in the 1940's. Since then, HYDRA has grown inside it like a virus," Widow translated. Her gaze flicked from Bucky to Steve. Then she added, "I think he means Operation Paperclip, don't you? It was a program to reintegrate captured German and Russian scientists after the Second World War."

"Da," Bucky said simply.

Steve straightened. "Did Tony know about this? About who you are?"

"About HYDRA, yes. Who I was? No. He found me in cryostasis in a HYDRA base. I owed him my loyalty for setting me free, but not my history."

Tony had rescued Bucky? Steve felt a flash of pain as he remembered again he'd never be able to thank Tony. He didn't bother shoving it down. He'd use that pain, later, for revenge. "Show me," Steve said. "I need to know how far this goes, and who I can trust."

"If you want your proof, I have it, and something else you may wish to see. Come with me, Captain America." Bucky gestured to the helicopter. Steve hesitated just a beat -- old habits died hard -- but then he started forward. He didn't expect the Black Widow to follow along after him.

"You don't have to come."  He looked at Bucky. "You promised to let her go."

Bucky said nothing. But his eyes were cold and hard, and Steve knew that he'd only freely said as much as he had because he didn't plan for Widow to walk away from this.

Steve stepped in front of the agent. If Bucky was going to shoot her, he'd have to go through him. "You promised to let her go," he repeated.

"I'm seeing this through," Widow said, surprising Steve. "If half of what he said is true--" Her gaze shifted as she addressed the Soldier directly. "I left the KGB because I had red I needed to wipe out of my ledger. If I've been working for HYDRA all this time, instead, I want to know about it."

Bucky nodded once and gestured for her to turn around. He unlocked her handcuffs, and Widow rubbed at her wrists.

Bucky climbed into the pilot's seat and took off.

 

* * *

**OoOoO**

* * *

 

 

The helicopter ride was short jaunt across the city. Bucky landed them on the roof of a squat, unmarked building. From there, he led them down a rickety looking staircase into the sublevels.

It was an underground lab -- _Secret villain lair,_ Steve's mind helpfully supplied -- and they weren't the only ones inside.

Steve's gaze skittered from several scared men, looking like doctors in their lab coats, and stopped for a moment at Bruce Banner who was half-standing from a counter at their appearance, looking startled. The doctors all were cuffed at the ankles with thin chains, but Banner was free.

"Why is Captain America here?" Bruce asked, looking to Bucky. He moved to the side, and beyond Steve saw a hospital bed, with active monitors above it. A single figure lay still.

Steve knew who was on that bed, knew it even before he vaulted over the table that separated the two sides of the room. The captive doctor's scattered awkwardly out of his way.

"Tony," Steve gasped. "Oh-- _Tony_."

His husband was whole, unburned, and alive, but plugged into too many machines to count. Thick gauzing wrapped around his waist and stomach. He was breathing from a ventilator, but cracked open his eyes at the sound of Steve's voice.

Clearly on pain medication, Tony's dark eyes were hazy and confused. He grew visibly alarmed as Steve gripped his fingers in his own shaking hand.

Steve knew at once what was wrong. He reached up and pulled his cowl away. "It's me, Tony. I'm here."

He heard Bruce Banner murmur, "That...explains a lot," but all of his attention was on his husband.

Tony's confusion vanished under recognition. His lips twitched around the ventilator tube, but he couldn't speak. He weakly squeezed Steve's fingers in return.

Later, Steve would hear the whole story from Bruce. How Bucky had been alerted by JARVIS that Tony was near to death. He completed his mission, liberated Bruce from SHIELD, and for good measure he kidnapped a couple of the doctors who had been experimenting on him. One doctor, who had also been part of the Winter Soldier project, he killed, and stuffed inside the Iron Man armor in Tony's place before he triggered the suit's manual self-destruct.

The remaining doctors were told that if Iron Man died, so would they.  

And later, as Tony healed and became antsy with laying in bed, there would be tough conversations, hard truths to face up to, and decisions to be made on which side Steve was going to jump.

He already knew.

Captain America was an agent of SHIELD, and an organization infected by HYDRA was one that needed to be brought down. Steve planned on getting Sam and Clint out, too.

And Steve would have to get a different name -- something dark and wandering.  A break from his past.

He wondered if Nomad would do.

 

~ fin ~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading!
> 
> Critique always welcome. :)


End file.
